lost among the pages
I long never to leave
another world, different faces
the longer the book
the faster I read
the fantasy, my mind took
flew away, gone at last
uncertain of reality
escaping it's firm grasp
but what will become of me
as I burrow and hide
into the books I flee?
a great adventure
is what I long and crave
yet in reality, I will never venture
I am scared
because at the end
pages will sit idle as they were all I cared.
I reread the last Harry Potter book between last night and today. It made me feel very melancholy at the end. I hate the prologue at the end... it makes me sad to have missed 19 years of Harry and everyone else's life. Why do I feel so sad to miss a character from a books life? It wasn't real. Yet everyday I hide myself away, reading books, my head lost in my own world of imagination. I miss out on parts of my own life. Things I find myself scared to face. I am a coward. Too scared to live my own life the way I truly want to, in order to be happy. I can live vicariously through my books...but when it comes down to the end...we all die and what true love and life will I have to remember? Pages of print telling me what their adventure found... while I sat idle, too scared to grab my own. Fear of the unknown... can destroy life... If only I could now find the courage to grab my life and make it be what I want it to. Though with my books of fantasy, I find I long for those things that we know not to be real. Things of fantasy are my longing...and unobtainable. From a young age I always wished to be born in a different time, a different world. I do not fit here. I love my family but I long for something more...which I am unsure of. I'm not sure I know how to be happy anymore. I wish I knew how to find happiness. It's just an ongoing battle within myself for my life. Wish me luck.
~T~
No comments:
Post a Comment