Blinded to Opportunity

There it goes...
did you see it?
yes, yes, it was there.
it just goes to show...
you don't believe it!
you should really take more care...
It was so close!
I can't believe you missed it.
well, maybe next time you should stare.
you're so blind, you can't see past your nose.
Right there! You missed it!
guess when you're ready, you'll see it there.

how many times do we pass up opportunity just because we are too scared to take the risk or we don't wanna see it?... I am scared of opportunity all the time...I just blind myself to it because I don't think I deserve that opportunity. So, maybe the key is to be confident in yourself and grab those opportunities. They won't always keep coming.
~T~

God's Teasing Whispers

cupping a hand to my ear
I strain to listen
for the whispers I expect to hear
where have you gone!?
speak louder please
I need to know when to grab on
your silent whispers tease
is it my imagination?
or is it really you?
Yell! Don't wait for an invitation.
I really have no clue...
Give me a sign.
slap me in the face with it!
hold me close and show me
my heart can be blind to what's good for it
show me the way to be
please...

still waiting for my answers...
~T~

God

an unseen hand works from above
healing, creating, changing
filling us with His love
beauty in the tree, beauty in the life
even through blood stained, dirty tears
He pulls us through the strife
without Him, we would be none
with Him, we are loved
and praise His name til on Earth His work be done
and then to the Heavens we will storm
and bask in His Holy Glory
in His love, forever warm.

...no explanations needed....it's how I see and feel.
~T~

Hiding

Somewhere over the rainbow
the stars still shine
and when I want to hide away
it won't be considered a crime
the lollipop kids will smile and dance with me
it'll be a celebration
they'll let me be who I want to be
I will skip down the yellow brick road
and when I find price charming
he'll be a man, not a toad
when the door locks behind
I won't leave him outside
our dreams will be one
and from him I won't want to hide.

Just wrote this between last night and today. This is about how I love to hide away in my own little world, involved in all my writing/reading/artsy/dreaming stuff. My dad exclaims to me at times, "it's alive!" and my mom says, "we see her when she gets hungry". It'd be better if I had my own place. They see me about as much as if I had my own place...soon I hope. ;) lol. anyways... It's about how I will know the man who is right for me because, I won't feel like I need to hide away with him. I can be who I am and who I want to be in front of him and not feel judged. So hard to do that around people who don't necessarily like how you spend your time. If my dad had his way, my time would be spent working on something that's actually work work. I have a job....that's work enough. I like to spend my free time enjoying the things I enjoy. :)
~T~

Forcing

I step up to the plate
Hey! this should be fun!
Batter up! Batter up!
Let's give it a run
quick sand makes up home plate as I step up
Sure! Why not?
It can't be THAT rough
down I sink
every instinct screams to fight it
but there I stand sinking
holding my tongue, biting it
too sweet, too soon
Just slow down, give me some room
too desperate, too lonely
is it worth the phony?
trying not to lie, avoiding the truth
too afraid of letting the other fall
so here I stand sinking
hoping it will get better once I hit the ball.

Can't explain this at this time...but maybe you can figure it out w/o explainations.
~T~

Hot Bath

when all drains
to the last drop
just remember
the facet is turned off
turn it on
and bathe free
soak and wrinkle
with a good book to read


I wrote this poem in the literal sense and metaphoric. Literal, because I love to just relax in the hot bath and read. I could spend hours in there as long as I have a good size hot water heater. lol. Methaphoric because in whatever we do and it seems like things are draining or going bad that it just takes our own determination and striving toward it to stop the drain and fill our life back up the way we want. =)
~T~

Cookie Cutter Beauty

Pat a back
give a hug
fake a smile
sweep the dust under the rug...
Barbie, Barbie, Barbie
everywhere we turn
trying to be perfect
trying to be pleasant
being beautiful is our concern
cookies! cookies!
let us cut
doesn't matter
chocolate or peanut butter with nuts
the best are sugar coated
like me
plump and tasty.

This is another poem about self image. I wrote this a long time ago. It seems like all these girls look the same with their bleach blond hair and Gap clothes...
~T~

The Girl in the Mirror

The girl in the mirror glares back at me
she's not happy that I'm staring back at her
I'm not who she wants me to be
she runs her fingers through her hair, unsure...
she hates me, I hate her
with a sigh, I accept this
Only when someone new stares back
will we be content not to miss
miss the other who makes us frown & want to slap
she hates me, I hate her
It may never change
But this will continue all the same
til I can see her there and not feel guilty shame
til I can see her beauty
til she has less booty...
she hates me, I hate her
I peek again, needing the reminder of a double take
...but maybe I'll get lucky
and the mirror will break...

This is a poem I just wrote yesterday or the day before...I really can't remember which.lol. Anyways, it's about bad self image and not knowing if you can change and be happy with what you see.
~T~

Behind Closed Eyes

hiding, holding deep beneath the sand
seeing another world behind closed eyes
afraid to grow up, take a stand
live the life given, so afraid, she cries
so many adventures lived behind closed eyes
but so many lost in real life
she lives a half life
here...but not...and always wishing
wishing for that on the other side
so, lazily she lies, dreaming
from the world...she hides
...in many others...
behind closed eyes

This poem is about me. Sometimes I feel like I'm walking around, my eyes glazed over, my mind in another world besides the one I'm walking in. My imagination always exploring other places that I've read about or just dreamt up myself. It's hard to force myself back into reality. I think my family even realizes that my mind is always adrift. I've decided to try to rein it in but keep it free at the same time by learning to share these worlds with others, by writing. I hope I can succeed. Wish me luck. :)
~T~

Untitled poem

The hot lava boils
pounding, pounding
through my veins
rushing, racing
never to feel the same
liquid heat glazes
the hills
red brimmed
and sore
let it be no more
and the drip tumbles down
staining the page.

I actually put a red stain on the page in my notebook that I wrote this on. This is supposed to be about heart break, about feeling like someone has stabbed you in the heart and you are crying as the blood trickles down. It is untitled only because I have never come up with a proper title that I think fits it well. Any suggestions?
~T~

To Conquer Fear

Thunder! Thunder!
Roar for me!
show me your weakness
and cease to be!
In my grasp
you will find
your power is useless
and I'm not so kind
you try to rattle
and addle my brain
try your hardest
my fear, you will find, is not a game
you will cower
I will be the victor
you have no power
for lightening is my sister.

This is about conquering fears. I like to read this one out loud with a strong stern almost angry voice. Be the victor of your fears. :)
~T~

Forget Me

Save me, I ask you please...
Give me, I ask you please...
Allow me, I ask you please...
Follow me, I ask you please...
Please, I ask you...
Save me, give me...
Please, I ask you...
Allow me, follow me...
simple and some what weird requests
I know. You know. I want. You want.
I... don't know...I don't want...
But you do and that's all that matters
don't think about me
I don't need you to save me or give me
I don't need you to allow me or follow me
so just think about me once and throw me
out of your mind, heart, soul, and life
I'm useless to you and you just need you
forget about me...
please.

I wrote this after feeling unappreciated and not cared for by the person whom I was in a relationship with at the time. He was a selfish sort of man who never seemed to care about what I wanted or felt. So many times I just felt like I was an object to him and ignored when it came to something I wanted or needed even... He didn't mean to be that way I suppose, it was just his nature, how he was raised.
~T~

Endurance

and sometimes those who knew me best
could stand to learn the rest
I am not what they see
I understand why they flee
forgotten, overlooked, passed by
I do want to try
yet I am not strong enough
to trudge through this rough
down I fall, hit by rocks
so when someone comes to knock
silence will greet them back
for no one will be forced to endure my slack
I wish not for anyone
patience, tolerance, for me, none
too cowardly to face life
too cowardly to face death
so alone I sit, silent to the grave
trying to endure this life I've made.

This is about feeling invisible and forgotten. I have felt like I have been abandoned by my friends for reasons I don't understand. I am also many times just ignored and I don't understand that either. I am a nice person with tons of creativity and I just want to share it with everyone. I just don't know what to do with myself. If I only understood what it is I do or about me that makes people not think of me as special enough or worth their time...
~T~